Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand
her at all.

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more
willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

S • C • O • R • P • I • O: The Freak in Bed
Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness. Most caring person you will ever meet! AMAZING IN BED..!!! Not the kind of person you wanna **** with…u might end up crying… The most irresistible. Rare 2 find. Funny. Talkative. Erotic. Smart. Loves sports. Gets what he/she wants. Loves to be in a relationship.

V • I • R • G • O: The Lover
Dominant in relationships. Sexy. someone loves them right now. Freak in bed. Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart. Intellectual. Attractive. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Hard to forget. Love at first sight. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. The one and only. Ultimate sexiness.Great kisser.

L • I • B • R • A • : The *****
Can be mean sometimes, and will Probably knock your ass out, if crossed the wrong way!! EXTREMELY sexy. Intelligent. Energetic. Predict future. Most erotic. (Freak in bed.) (GREAT kisser.) Always get what they want. Sexy. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. The sexiest ever….Romantic. Caring.

A • R • I • E • S: The Sexiest
Outgoing. Lovable. Spontaneous. Not one to **** with. Erotic. Funny. Take you on trips to the moon in bed. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY sexy. Loves being in long relationships.=) Addictive. Loud. best in bed.

A • Q • U • A • R • I • U • S: the strongest
Trustworthy. Sexy. professional kissers. One of a kind. Loves being in long-term relationships. Extremely energetic and funny. Unpredictable. Will exceed your expectations. Loves music. Not a Fighter, But will Knock the **** out of u. The best and biggest freak in bed! Strong. Considered to be a “Spartan.” The most intelligent. falls in love too easily. Doesn’t show it but is easy to hurt.

G • E • M • I • N • I: passionate
Nice. Love is one of a kind. Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you the **** out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING.Horny. Freak in Bed. Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. ULTRA SEXY. THE MOST IRRESISTIBLE. .

L • E • O: wild in bed
Great talker. Sexy and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have fun. Is really good at a lot. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth. Loyal.Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Great when found. 7

C • A • N • C • E • R: Most Amazing Kisser
Very high sex appeal. Great in bed!!! Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak in bed. Spontaneous. Great telling stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.

P • I • S • C • E • S: The Piece of ass
Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. Too Sexy, DAMN IT. Very high SEX appeal. Has the last word. The best to find, hardest to keep. Fun to be around. Freak in the sheets. Extremely weird but in a good way. Super good in bed. Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful. A partner for life. Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet. 5

C • A • P • R • I • C • O • R • N: THE BEST IN BED
Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future. Irresistible, awesome kisser.gets what he or she wants. BY FAR the BEST in BED. Very sexy. Coolest. Loves to own Gemini’s in sports.Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Loves to be your first. So you’ll never forget. Smart.

T • A • U • R • U • S: The sex addict
Aggressive. Freak in bed. Rare to find! Loves being in long relationships Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Sexy as …u no!….. Loves to help people in times of need. Outstanding kisser. Very funny. Awesome personality. Stubborn. Sexual as ……… Most caring person you will ever meet! One of a kind. Not one to **** with. Are the most sexiest people on earth!

S • A • G • I • T • T • A • R • I • U • S. The Sexy one
Spontaneous. Horny. Freak in Bed. Great when found. Loves being in long relationships. The one. So much love to give. Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Most caring person you will ever meet! Not the kind of person you wanna mess with you might end up crying.

The Tapori Style

This one’s for the complete First Day First Show ‘tapori’ type Romeos out to woo their very own Juliet on Valentine’s Day. If you think you are one of them, then we are making things easy for you by giving you a quick list of the Top 5 songs which you can use to convey your message Direct Dil Se.

1. Excuse Me Kya Re…Mera Dil Tere Pe Fida Re – ( STYLE)
2. Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast Mast – (MOHRA)
3. Jumma Chumma De De – (HUM)
4. Chalti Hai Kya Nau Se Barah – (JUDWAA)
5. Kya Ada Kya Jalwa Tere Paaro – (SHASTRA)

The Q-n-A Style

Pyaar Mein Sawaal Jawaab Toh Hotein Hi Rehte Hain…. For all you guys who prefer the ‘Interview’ approach and like to ask your loved one in Question-n-Answer format this next list of Top 5 songs would surely do your world a whole deal of good.

1. O Lal Dupatte Wali Tera Naam To Bata – (AANKHEN)
2. Ae Kya Bolti Tu – Aati Kya Khandala – (GHULAM)
3. Naam Kya Hai….Pyaar Ka Maara … – (YEH DILLAGI)
4. What is Mobile Number? – (HASEENA MAAN JAYEGI)
5. Yeh Tu Kya Karela Hai – (EXCUSE ME)

The Shaayarana Andaaz

‘Main Shayar Toh Nahin….Magar Ae Haseen…Jabse Dekha Maine Tujhko, Mujhko Shaayri Aa Gayee…’crooned a young Rishi Kapoor to his love Dimple in the cult romance Bobby. Even a couple of decades after this film’s release, we have our very own love-struck Majnus getting all poetic while expressing love to their Lailas. So, if you are on of those ‘Kaviraaj’ types, this list of songs will surely come in handy tomorrow.

1. Ae Chand Teri Chandni Ki Kasam – (TERA JADOO CHAL GAYA)
2. Ek Ladki Ko Dekha To Aisa Laga – (1942 A LOVE STORY)
3. Masha Allah Masha Allah – (SAAWARIYA)
4. Aankhon Mein Teri Ajab Si – (OM SHANTI OM)
5. Chand Sifarish Jo Karta Humari – (FANAA)

If your girl is the one who just despises anything which is ordinary or routine, then we surely know how we can help you. Hindi films have seen some of the biggest stars right from King Khan to Govinda to even the legendary Kamal Hassan express their love in the most outlandish way using the craziest words. So, if they can do it, why can’t you? Go ahead and give it a shot. Impress your girl with some really wacky, corny and even cheesy Bollywood numbers. You never know she just might fall for it.

1. Phenk Hawa Mein Ek Chumma – (RAM JAANE)
2. Ek Chumma Tu Mujho Udhar De De – (CHHOTE SARKAR)
3. Telephone Dhun Mein Hasne Waali – (HINDUSTANI)
4. You Are My Chicken Fry…You Are My Fish Fry – (ROCK DANCER)
5. Sonpapdi Meri Sonpapdi – (AUNTY NO 1)

Khayaalon Mein…

You know it you are in love when all day you are only dreaming about that special someone. Bollywood has always had a fascination for dream sequences, so if you are one of those who are not lucky to have your special someone with you on V-Day, don’t worry you can still dream about her the whole day long. What’s more we even give you some of Hindi cinema’s really popular dream sequences and you never know, just like in Films your love story may also end up being a reality.

1. Tumhe Jo Maine Dekha – ( MAIN HOON NAA)
2. Pehla Nasha – (JO JEETA WOHI SIKANDER)
3. Woh Ladki Hai Kahan – (DIL CHAHTA HAI)
4. Suraj Hua Madham – (K3G)

The Devdas style

Lastly, if you are among those unfortunate souls who got dumped or who couldn’t get lucky this Valentine, don’t worry coz you are not alone. You can always try next year and in the interim, grow stubble, wear a Cap and start singing some Dard- Bhare Nagme like these…

1. Tanhaiyan – ( AAP KA SURROOR – THE MOVIEE)
2. Achcha Sila Diya Tune Mere Pyaar Ka… – (BEWAFAA SANAM)
3. Ae Kaash Kahin Aisa Hota Ke Do Dil Hote Seene Mein – (MOHRA)
4. Why Did You Break My Heart…. – (AKELE HUM AKELE TUM)

Finally, after too much sulking and some ‘dukhi gaane’ you can finally resort to two options
a) Hit the bottle a-la Vivek Oberoi and sing ‘Ae Ganpat Chal Daaru La’
b) Go and bang on your girl’s door a-la Salman Khan and sing ‘Tadap Tadap’

DAY OVER>>>>>>> GAME OVER